Headed to the Vineyard

August is supposed to be a slow month in Washington, but apparently POTUS didn't get the memo. He's been on the road a ton this month. Actually has been gone more than he's been here it seems. I was at the WH on Monday so bid him farewell on the trip for the early part of the week which included stops in Wisconsin, LA, Seattle, Columbus, and Miami. Not exactly places close by to each other but luckily my colleagues had a chartered plane this time.

On Thursday, POTUS heads up to Martha's Vineyard for some family vacation time. I know there's been much discussion on how many trip POTUS has taken on the taxpayer's dime and as you know I'm not here to discuss those issues. I will say that I see both sides to the arguments and I just do what I'm told and follow him where he's going. This time it's for 10 days in MV and I am the lucky one who gets to go for the full trip.

But before you say, "Becky, you have such a glamorous life. Can you take me along in your suitcase? Do you need an assistant?" (all of which I hear every time I tell people I'm going), let me give you a lay of the land.

In fairness, I have only been to MV one time and it was for only a few hours with my family as part of our vacation to Massachusetts. I vaguely remember it and in my head, I still picture it like the show "Wings" that was on NBC in the early 90's. I realize they were on Nantucket but it's all the same! :) I can't wait to find Lowell the mechanic and Roy the ticket counter guy!!

Anyway, I'll be traveling up there a day before POTUS and then staying a day later so my trip will be 12 days. A significant chunk of time. Especially when my co-worker booked us to stay at a "holistic retreat". Frankly, I was unfamiliar with the concept until I googled our "hotel". Let's just say it will be an adventure!! It boasts in specializing in helping people become more balanced, healthier people through detox. And not the detox that many Hollywood types go to in order to get a reduced sentence when facing any charges. Or again, maybe it is. I don't know. According to the website,
"We offer an intimate healing-based detoxification program set in a quiet home-like environment. We are NOT A SPA we are a Health Retreat. Our focus is on detoxification cleansing, weight loss and addressing chronic health issues. Our programs strive to heal the body and spirit of illness and pain through proper nutrition, anti-aging protocols, exercise, oxygen and electromagnetic therapies, phyto-nutrients and detoxification treatments. Our fully-liquid detoxification protocol is based on the program developed by Dr. Roni and detailed in her book 21 Pounds in 21 Days, The Martha’s Vineyard Diet Detox™. "

I'm not exactly sure what some of those words mean but when I was looking at the website, I thought this must be some cruel joke. Maybe my co-worker was trying to tell me something. Maybe I do need to lose 21 pounds in 21 days. Then I kept reading. My favorite line on the website was this:

"The detox is a fully liquid protocol–you will not chew while you are at the Retreat."

That's right there are no solid foods at this place! Seriously. I might be well on my way of returning to my birth weight after 12 days of this!! Then I read about the colon cleansings and the parasite treatments and I have no idea what I'm in for!! I'm guessing that the price is right so I'll take one for my company on this one! At least I'll give it my best effort!